WORTH THE WAIT



Question: What do you do with your singleness as a Christian female of color?

Okay soo let's just dive in shall we?

First things first Ruth and Boaz's story is not your "goals". I personally feel like the man that sets the standards for all men is Jesus. Now hear me out, I'm not saying your husband or boyfriend should be exactly like Jesus and be perfect. No. What I'm saying is that they should love christ as much as they love you, hell they should love Christ more than you. If anything they should be like Jesus because he loves the church unconditionally. There should be no condition to your love for your partner. He should learn to forgive like Christ and also learn to be obedient and so on. These are all the characteristics Christ posses and it's something we all look for in a man hence why I said he should be like Christ.  
A few mistakes we as Christians make is to jump into a relationship without being sure about it, when it affects us in the long run. For example you meet and unbeliever and fall in love with him and as time goes on you want to take him to church and wants him to believe in God. He's not interested in any of your "religious stuff", what do you do?
That's where I see most people going to God, but they've forgotten that they didn't  make an inquiry to God about this man. You can't change anybody if it's not apart of God's plan. God is the one writing your life so it only makes sense if you ask him about certain people in your life and who is meant for you. Most times God will tell us to wait or that we're not with the right people. 
Why waste your singleness?
 Most people forget that they're single for a reason. Most times people are single because God is trying to work on them for their next relationship to be permanent.Often times its because you need that time to discover yourself before you get into another relationship, and most times its for you to sit down and think what you did wrong in your previous relationship and how you can fix it for both yourself and future partner.
It's extremely dangerous to "relationship dive" and what that means is to go from one relationship to the another. There's a quote that goes "You're never alone if you love the person You're alone with" that's how I view relationship diving. If you can't be by yourself for a few months or years then you shouldn't be in an relationship at all. People who relationship dive often times crave too much attention from their partner, most times that's when the fallout happens.
Are my standards unrealistic?
Another thing I see is the comparison and unrealistic standards. (Lol I might be in this category thanks to Wattpad .) The only man that can and have lived up to the "perfect" standard is Jesus. When we make a long list of things we want a man to do before we even agree to go on the first date, we're chasing him away.
I'm not saying make it easy on him, don't do that because you'll be considered easy. But do have realistic standards, like is he Christian? Is he a hard worker? goal oriented? a doer or watcher? Things like that can give you an idea of what to look for in a man.
Last but not least, make inquiry to God about this man. God is always waiting for us to come to him with things like this and basically just ask his opinion. It's definitely worth investing time into, because once God shows you the person for you there's no mistaking that it will last a  lifetime. Is it going to be easy? No, like most things in life it's not going to be easy but your determination and drive is what will make the difference. 
I wanna give a huge shoutout to my Wattpad family for encouraging me to share this series on here and be open enough to talk about these things. I'm really excited for the next topic and questions so you guys don't hold back send in all your questions @ Simplyjaelicousfashion@gmail.com 
P.s. The Dear Black Girls Series is recieving mad love and I am very grateful. Thank you guys so much. This is what I love to do and you guys make it possible for me to spread positivity and self love. thank you!
Peace, Love and Happy Shopping.


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