RANDOM RANT #9 AM I ENOUGH?



Then your poverty will come as a robber And your want like an armed man.
 -Proverbs 24:34

For the past month I have intensely questioned myself of my worth. I don't know where this feeling is coming from and why I feel the need to do this; but I'm going to address this issue.  I have been measuring my success with others. I have been feeling like I'm not enough.

I don't  where to begin... I have struggled with my confidence for a while now. At a young age I was told to not compare myself to people, to live authentically. I have tried to do that for the most of my life but I can't help the competitive feeling. The feeling of wanting to be the best, the feeling of wanting to succeed at all cost. It comes and it goes and I know that's not my personality so I try to ignore it.. but lately it's been coming frequently.  I have been comparing myself with other bloggers and asking myself what I'm doing wrong. I have been comparing myself to these women with several years experience and a lot of opportunities and did I say experience? yes EXPERIENCE!  Is it fair to me? No! But does my mind care? I think not (lol).

It's amazing how  your worst enemy can be yourself. Like you by yourself can terrorize your own self It's crazy.  My problem I figured is that I worry too much about what people have to say about me. I worry about what people think about me and how the world perceives me. I go about life doing things to try to please people when the only person I need to please is God. Sometimes I get sad for no reason and something keeps telling me that it's not ok to express myself when I get like this. Every time I try to be authentic there's always something holding me back. Always! I show the world the parts of me I want them to see, so they can conclude that I have my life together when that's not the case.

I get through life everyday by the grace of God. Most days I just break down and ask God for strength because I'm fighting some battles that are bigger than me. I keep trying to convince myself that I'm in the breaking and molding process. I want to believe that's what it is. But whatever it is let the will of God be done in my life. I wake up everyday and speak words of faith into my life. I tell myself; You are enough, you are beautiful, you are strong, you are smart and you are amazing.



P.S. This is the outfit I wore a few months ago.

I'm not much of a philosopher or anything of that nature, I'm just a thinker, a really deep thinker.  This is the easiest way I can share my thoughts with you all. Thanks for reading if you have a question or suggestion on what my next rant should be about please feel free to email me @simplyjaelicousfashion@gmail.com. I'm always open to suggestions.


That's all for now, until next time stay fabu-lous!

Peace, love and happy shopping

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